Happy Boxing Day, everyone! The annual "WP:DICK of Distinction" awards pageant is a semi-hallowed tradition here at the Review (new members, read this for some background.) To compete for the grand WP:DICK of Distinction prize, the contestant must be an active admin or admin defrocked over the past year.

Here are the categories for nomination:

WP:DICK of Distinction -- for all-around rottenness by an admin

The Tag-Team Event

Miss Incongeniality

and for the good guys...

the Straight Shooter award for honest admins

and the Cojones de latón, for the non-admin who has distinguished himself in combat with the cabal

WP:DICK of Distinction -- Tiptoety (T-C-L-K-R-D) a dick among dicks... a true brown log, to rise in to the top of the Wikipediot Cesspool. A little boy, who will never be a man, a child of wiki and the brain damaged fool he shown himself to be.

As in past years, once the poll is set up, please make sure that voters can abstain in some categories. My votes will only be for the good guys.

Obvious nom for Cojones, as in past years, is Cla68.

Obvious nom for Straight Shooter, as in past years, is Doc Glasgow/Scott Macdonald.


(from 30,000 feet... thank you Google for free wireless)

I agree entirely with your nomination of the artist formerly known as Doc glasgow (T-C-L-K-R-D) , for his ground-breaking role in confronting the BLP marauders.

In the WP:DICK category, I would like to nominate Georgewilliamherbert (T-C-L-K-R-D) , who has long gone unrecognized as a versatile and devious hitman in the service of numerous POV-pushing rouge admins. Tiptoety is also a good call.

I love your Sgt Pepper collage. The one of Gerard is particularly good.

I nominate Sandstein for dick of distinction, but second your choices of GWH and Tiptoety ('a true brown log to rise to the surface of the Wikipedia cesspool'). I would nominate Victim of Censorship for cojones, but is there a requirement for a 'fixed abode' over there?

It's actually Frank Zappa's collage, with a few relevant insertions.


I think that IronDuke (T-C-L-K-R-D) is a natural for Miss Incongeniality.

I would like to propose a new award category, if anyone is interested: Most Vexatious Litigant in an ArbCom Fiasco. I don't have a favorite for this, but I do think we've been remiss in not awarding a DICKie for ArbCom-related activities.

I would also like to propose the category Forgotten, but not Gone (or something better), for those who have largely faded from view, but remain more subtly evil, for example Jayjg (T-C-L-K-R-D) and SlimVirgin (T-C-L-K-R-D) .

As re IronDuke (T-C-L-K-R-D) , I second that eructation.

We need a Knob-polisher of Distinction. Somebody with cheeks like beefsteak and the salivary glands of an elephant. Someone who swallows.

I nominate QuackGuru, prime fluffer and buffer of Jimbo's bio and TALK pages.

I know he doesn't fit into any categories, but Baseball Bugs has to be one of the most worthless, irritating drama whores in existence.

I think you guys have Tiptoety all wrong.

(also from 30,000 feet but a different flight)

Complete agreement on that one. The kooks have the "Tony Sidaway Drama Queen Award" and the "Busted Urinal Award" either of which would be a perfect fit for BB. Perhaps the "Mumbai Kid" would be a fitting accolade for him.

I'm thinking Smashville for DICK. He spends a lot of time taunting editors who make unblock requests.

I don't think there is really any Wikipedian that deserves it this year.

Instead, can we give it to all of the Commons admin and the Stewards who abused their ops to try and keep the excessive porn?


I think they deserve it for their extreme political ideology, their jeopardizing any credibility the WMF may have, and for being just overall dirt bags who will say whatever to defend stolen porn images possibly of children while simultaneously accusing Google of being evil for taking pictures of their homes without permission.

Pinning that C.F. on the Commons admins and stewards as a class? I call BS.

Please read before responding.

I specified those who abused their ops. There were many - those who wheel warred in deletions, blocking those who complained, blocking those who merely pointed out that allowing pedophiles to run rampant was a problem, etc.

Hell, one admin even replaced the main page with a cuss filled rant against Jimbo for daring to remove the excessive porn. If you think that is acceptable behavior, then you can refer to such mentality as exactly why you were removed from being a Steward.

How about Baseball Bugs? He is everywhere on AN/I and on various arbcommy areas. Saying much, adding nothing.

Or perhaps he deserves a special-achievement award of some kind?

I think that manic WikiLawyers, Porn Protectors, and Knob Polishers can all be subsumed under the general DICK category. I don't want to make things too elaborate, and plus the construction of the actual voting poll is extremely labor-intensive as it is. However, I am sympathetic to Gomi's comments about Slim and Jayjg-- perhaps some lifetime achievement awards may be in order. Those aren't submitted to the voters -- it's in the hands of the Program and Catering Committee or Loya Jirga. I'm sure that Slim would be honored to share that award with the only previous recipient, PoetGuy.

Vic, would you care to disclose your WP username?

The Nominees thus far are

WP:DICK of Distinction:
Tiptoety (T-C-L-K-R-D)
Georgewilliamherbert (T-C-L-K-R-D)
Sandstein (T-C-L-K-R-D)
Smashville (T-C-L-K-R-D)
Baseball Bugs (T-C-L-K-R-D)

The Tag-Team Event:

Miss Incongeniality:
IronDuke (T-C-L-K-R-D)


the Straight Shooter:
Scott Macdonald (T-C-L-K-R-D) née Doc glascow (T-C-L-K-R-D)


the Cojones de latón:
Cla68 (T-C-L-K-R-D)

Two Dicks of Distinction were a pair of former mop-swingers that went out with bizarre displays of self-destructive behavior: Tanthalas39 and Rlvese. This will probably be the last that we see of them (under those names, at least).

Our man Coffee also retired in 2010, albeit not as dramatically, but he was a wee dick in the months leading up to his sign-off.

And, of course, Cirt, for reasons that do not require repeating.

The Straight Shooter Award: Juliancolton. Last year, we had a lot of fun at Juliancolton's expense, but a check at his recent contribution record shows that he is dramatically easing off the Wiki-addiction and is playing on Wikipedia in a far more mature and measured output. Today is also his birthday, so happy 17th to a genuine diamond!

Cojones: Our favorite paisan, Giano, for injecting some much-needed oxygen into the ghastly dull Arbcom election.

Very good, Sir. Have we no nominees for Tag Team?

Hold on. Does anyone else think we should review the past DICK awards, so we can at least be aware
someone is getting a double award? If nothing else, it will help to maintain a bit of "historical balance" .
I'd feel better if certain people were excluded from winning multiple awards. SV is already
out, both for behaving herself in 2010 and for being such a popular pest in the previous 4 years.
I would say similar things for both JzG and Gerard. And Cla68, Thatcher, Alison already got kudos
as straight shooters. Should the following be excluded from subsequent award votes?
And what about Kevin?

2007 awards
DICK winner: tie, Cyde and SV
Runner-Up: Jayjg
Miss Incongeniality: SV
Straight Shooter: Tawker

2008 awards
DICK: JzG
Runner-Up: same
Miss Incongeniality: same
Tag Team: Crum375 and SV
Straight Shooter: Giano
Straight Shooter runner-up: Alison

2009 awards
DICK: tie, Gerard and FT2
Runner-Up: Gerard
Miss Incongeniality: tie, Elonka and JzG
Tag Team: Odd nature, Salmon of Doubt, KillerChihuahua, Jim62sch, Mu301 and FeloniousMonk
Straight Shooter: Thatcher
Straight Shooter runner-up: same
Cojones: Cla68
Cojones runner-up: same

2010 awards
DICK: David Gerard
Runner-Up: same
Miss Incongeniality: same
Tag Team: SV and Will Beback
Straight Shooter: Alison
Cojones: Cla68

Furthermore, I absolutely think Cirt should be put up for the DICK award.

In the past 2 years, Cirt has successfully defamed an unknown number of people
in their BLPs, simply for association with the Church of Scientology, Transcendental
Meditation, or EST. Plus, don't forget that Cirt has been caught doing what appears to be
paid editing for restaurants, and nobody on WP said boo to him/her/whatever.

I can't think of many other admins who have done such a good job of
maintaining the secrecy of their real identity, while abusing Wikipedia's broken and
corrupt administration system. Jayjg is the only other one who has pulled that
off for any substantial length of time.

BASEBALL BUGS..that guy is a real loser!!!

I go by many names... but Joehazelton (T-C-L-K-R-D) was one of my wikinames.

You said "all". That can be parsed one of two ways and I guess you parsed it one, and I the other.

As for replacing the main page with a cuss filled rant, of course that's not acceptable behavior.

If you want to pursue this further I suggest a separate thread.

Be glad I just realized Rjd0060 and Rd232 are spelled differently. Otherwise I'd feel compelled to nominate the previously conflated person(s) for top honors.

"all of the Commons admin and the Stewards who"

There is only one way to parse it.

This is the appropriate place to bring up such things and you know it, so stop trollng.



Herschelkrustofsky, please add Lar to the list for being a complete douche who is trying to defend the undefendable. Even in his castrated state he is still the same outrageous prick. I think he should be next to Gmaxwell and the others.

Nihiltres and Joseph Reagle each deserve some sort of nomination for "off-Wikipedia Kool-Aid stirring".

And the recently discovered category of bottom-wipers?




I was just about to nominate Reagle, and there you were. Seconded.

Seconded

I can see your point, but it's important to remember that we are competing with the Oscars, the Tonys, the Emmys, and the Grammys. There is no tradition at those pageants that forbids a strong contestant from winning year after year. Plus, we have many new members of the academy here who have not yet exercised their franchise. If they want the exquisite thrill of casting a vote for David Gerard, I don't want to stand in their way.

On the other hand, it would be disappointing if the thing got too monotonous. For example, are Cla68 and Giano the only rank-and-file Wikipedians who possess any Cojones? If this were the year he ran for ArbCom, I would nominate the Fat Man, but his latest activity is mainly just rambunctious.

Which list?

OK, Peter, do you want to nominate Joehazelton? It should be based on on-Wiki activity, of course, not based on Vic's sweet and sentimental essays here at the Review.

Those guys are our competition in the criticism biz, although of course, we wield the Sword of Righteousness, whereas they brandish the Lips and Tongue of Obsequiousness.


The Nominees thus far are

WP:DICK of Distinction:
Baseball Bugs (T-C-L-K-R-D)
Cirt (T-C-L-K-R-D)
Coffee (T-C-L-K-R-D)
Georgewilliamherbert (T-C-L-K-R-D)
Rlvese (T-C-L-K-R-D)
Sandstein (T-C-L-K-R-D)
Smashville (T-C-L-K-R-D)
Tanthalas39 (T-C-L-K-R-D)
Tiptoety (T-C-L-K-R-D)


The Tag-Team Event:

Miss Incongeniality:
IronDuke (T-C-L-K-R-D)


the Straight Shooter:
Juliancolton (T-C-L-K-R-D)
Scott Macdonald (T-C-L-K-R-D) née Doc glascow (T-C-L-K-R-D)


the Cojones de latón:
Cla68 (T-C-L-K-R-D)
GiacomoReturned (T-C-L-K-R-D) née Giano (T-C-L-K-R-D)

Perhaps there should just be a second thread for TWOT of distinction with lots more categories.

Miss Incongeniality seems about right. That is where all the people trying to justify the porn or defend those who abused their ops to defend it belong. Add Gmaxwell, Thogo, Shoemaker's Holiday, Kameraad Pjotr, Mercy, Abigor, Mattbuck, etc.


Or you could just list all the Commons porno fiends as one big tag team, as they did take over the Commons IRC channel to organize their offense.

Hey now, Greg doesn't deserve all that.

As a matter of fact...

Malleus Fatuorum has made a Wiki career of stepping on the right toes. He deserves praise.

A real under-the-radar type is the Australian editor Johnfos, who fights a good fight on renewable energy issues.

For the other categories:

Dick of Distinction: TenPoundHammer (you don't need to ask why).

Tag-Team: Risker and Rlvese, due primarily to Risker's slimy block of an IP editor that called attention to Rlvese's plagiarism.

Agree with all of these (esp. the slimy part). Except Ten pound hammer. who he?

You really just don't give up, do you?

I'm happy to be nominated for Miss I as long as you are too. Bet you get more votes.

I would like to have a category of "Wikipediot of Distinction" and have your name placed nominated for that very special award. That award would be a gold plated turd.



I usually vote for all the bad guys.

My hope is you get nominated for on of the spots I can vote for.

Just for the sake of completeness, I think Lar should be listed in
the "dick of distinction" contest.

Seconded. There were people at school who sat at the front and were good, and those who sat at the back and arsed around. And there were those who hung around with the people at the back, but actually sat at the front. Lar.

Thirded. (Can I do that?) I'm sorry, man. You're just a serious dick.

I'll second this.

"For their tireless crusade to protect porn on commons, regardless of its educational value ... "

A good place to start would be the admins who collectively undeleted the porn that Jimbo deleted. Someone else has to fill in the names (Ottava?) as I have no desire to dig through the logs.

Ah, Last year it was so easy: I gave all my votes to Mike Godwin, for his "work" in the Gerard affair (=Extremely disgraceful; coming from someone so high in the pecking order. I always demand more of the people at the top! )

This year; dunno. I have hardly been back for about 1/2 a year....but some admins/editors over at Commons surely qualify for the awards? Or perhaps then it should be renamed the "WP: A BILLION DICKS of ALL Different Colors and Sizes"-award?

<edit>
Sounds good.

Oh yeah, this is a great way to make the DICK awards really mean something and have weight.

If Lar deserves to be put in as a candidate, he should nommed both for DICK and for Straight Shooter.
And if we wish to be "inclusive", Ottava deserves the same.

Tag team nominees: Chase Me Ladies, I'm the Cavalry and Panyd. How can anyone forget Panyd's bizarre RfA from earlier this year, when her sailor boy claimed that he "accidentally" edited on her laptop when they were engaged in a romantic rendezvous?

(By the way...is this Chase Me's gal?)

Straight Shooter: Paul Erik is a nice guy admin - why not give him some praise?

second


Eek! Shame on you!....
Damn--her followers list is full of spammers, iPhone devels, and assorted junk Twitter users........
I would say, she's probably Panyd (T-C-L-K-R-D) . Jimbo is also in the friends list.
Plus: she's on record as having a connection to Sarah Lawrence, and the Twitter user has some Sarah Lawrence links.
Plus: Blech.

I'll say it again: if these WP admins are so damned smart, why do they pretend to hide their real identities on WP,
but slobber all over the social-media sites with their egos?

(PS: her Deviant Art account.)

Sure, why not. Put us both in for both. Plus Miss Incongeniality.